Friday, July 25, 2014

A Few Bits About What's Been Happening / LOTSOFPICTURES!!!

I won't even do that whole, "I can't believe it's been so long since I've posted anything…blah, blah, blah…" because, frankly, I CAN believe it's been so long.

I thought that I was busy with Ezra.  And I really was.  But shit, man.  Two is different.  Two is tiring.  Two is guilt-ridden over spending so much less time with my oldest.  Two is mind-numbingly hard to juggle now that Penny is everywhere.  Two is fun.  Two is heartwarming when they're being so sweet to each other.  Two is pretty great :-)

I actually have guilt (when I'm lying in bed and can't sleep for one of the million reasons) over not updating as frequently as I did when Ez was a baby.  I love that I have so many memories captured here of his first two years.  I just cannot seem to find the right time to sit down and get it all out anymore.  Ezra is a very intense little boy and Penny is about as feisty as they come.  She started crawling at a break-neck speed a couple weeks ago and also will pull up and try cruising on just about every vertical surface of the house.  This has greatly changed my routine (if you can even call it that), as now I have roughly 12 seconds to run out of a room, grab whatever I needed, and run back before she's either right behind me, in the bathroom (seriously?  why does she always go into the bathroom??) or lying on her back, screaming because she fell down.  Oh, or eating a shoe.  Or whatever else she finds on the floor.  Man, this kid is into everything.

Meanwhile, my relationship with Ezra has taken a couple baby-steps forward.  I know it's going to take awhile, but I just miss my boy.  Between our summer in Maine last year, the arrival of Penny…and the subsequent loss of our one-on-one time, things between us have really been bad.  It was always just me & my Ez, all day long.  He only wanted Mommy for everything.  I welcomed his acceptance of Jordan into some activities before Penny was born.  I needed the help.  But it went from all to nothing, really quickly.  I was consumed with caring for Penny.  Oh, I still did things for him…but our fun time was gone.  And I was exhausted.  And overcome with the grief over losing my Dad that I'd fought so long to push aside.  It was just easier to let him slide right over to Jordan…but it broke my heart to see him go.  It makes me cry when I think about how I haven't been WITH him for these past several months.  He's a great kid.  He's so smart and jesus…he's hilarious.  And sweet.  So, I've been working on being better for him.  Listening better, speaking better, loving better.  And I think it's helping.

Also, Penny is getting to a point where I can leave her with Jordan for a short period and Ez & I can just be together.  We haven't done it yet, but I think it should happen soon.  Penny is a great baby and, when she isn't cutting new teeth (she has 4!!), she's pretty easy.  So, I'm really looking forward to that.  We have little glimpses, here and there, of our old selves…running around at a playground, etc…and it really makes me wish we had more of it.

I'm planning the kids' birthday party.  Oh.My.God.  My baby is now a big boy and is turning 4 (what?!) and my new baby is turning 1!  Holy shit, y'all.
So, in the spirit of making things easier, I'm planning a joint birthday party for them.  Because, let's face it…it's the same people that would attend both parties AND they're birthdays are 4 days apart.  I've only got a year or, maybe two, of combined parties…so I'd better take advantage.
Anyways, Ez has changed his mind on his party 'theme' a few times now.  It started off as a Thomas the Train party.  Then, it was a Lego party.  Now, it's a Frozen party.  He'd seen the movie once when he made this decision.  Actually, he'd seen about half of the movie…the other half was spent playing on the playground nearby (it was a movie-in-the-park put on by our friends).  I was a bit surprised, but quickly learned that it's because he's IN LOVE with Anna in the movie.  He gets all bashful and cute when she comes on or when I ask him about her.  It's too much.  I can barely handle how cute it is :-)

For all your hard work, reading my poorly-written, meandering thoughts…here's a bunch of pictures of those sweet, awesome kids…totally out of chronological order…but dammit, here they are.




































Monday, April 7, 2014

The Lost Photos of Last Fall :)

Did I seriously never put these pictures up?  They begin just before Penny was born, so I totally believe it, but damn.  So here goes…here's a bunch of photos that I now like to call…Fall…The Lost Photos ;-)


We spent a nice Saturday morning/afternoon up in Julian doing a little apple picking.  It was my very first time ever and I LOVED it.  I have never eaten so many apples in one day before, but holy crap, they were SO GOOD.  On the way home, I started having some pretty crazy contractions that were steadily getting closer and closer together.  I started thinking that it was a great possibility that we were having a baby that night/the next morning.  Ultimately, this was not the day Penny would grace us with her presence…but she had me fooled for a few hours :)

Our last "family of 3" photo :)

The fire station up in Julian was wide open and ready for Ezra!  This kid is still obsessed with firetrucks…and getting to "drive" a real firetruck only adds to that fire ;-)


My mom came to visit (and meet Miss Penny!) a couple weeks after she was born.  She just can't get enough of her grandkids and they adore her.
Ezra took Grammy down to the water.  He then wouldn't let her leave :)


Oma's Pumpkin Patch!  This would be our third annual trip there and it didn't disappoint.  LOVE this place!  The kids all have so much fun…and it's crazy that they have all grown so much since their first visit!  
Here's Ez, doing the obligatory cute-photo-posing-with-pumpkins

My boy on the tractor

Dammit, this kid is cute.

"Look mom!  Milkies!" - Ezra

Just take the freakin hay, sheep.  He's not gonna leave you alone until you do ;-)

Much like last year, he had to drive every.single.tractor.

The cow-print one is my fave...

I think he was really finding his inner-farmer.

It's Farmer Ezra!!
He said he wanted to be Hamm from Toy Story :)

Jordan getting Ez all set up on his cotton-hill sled
Me and my babies on the (very stinky) tractor ride through farm.  Penny managed to sleep the whole way…and all through the entire trip, really.  I mean, she's new…she needs to sleep!

Afterward, we hit up the (mediocre, at best) italian place…purely based on tradition.  I mean, you can't really expect much out in the middle of Lakeside, so I'll say that it's…not bad.  They always seem to be incredibly pissy about a big group of people with a ton of kids showing up.  And, I've done the restaurant thing, so I kinda get it…but still.
Here's Ez and a buddy playing the aging arcade game.  They may or may not have been legitimately playing..I'm guessing that only a few quarters were spent during the 20 minutes they spent "playing" ;-)










Saturday, March 1, 2014

It's been awhile...

Remember that Staind song?  Remember Staind?  I have a great memory of Aaron Lewis (singer) up on the main stage at HFStival (I dunno, '99ish), tears rolling down his face as he sang It's Been Awhile…along with every.single.person in attendance.  Which was a lot.  He was so happy to have 'made it.'

Thanks for taking a trip in the way-back machine with me :)

So, I've been absent for awhile.  Shit's been busy around here.  Not so much in a productive kind of way…just a I can't even keep up with the dishes & laundry kind of way.

Penny is GROWING.  Like, for real.  She's about 15lbs now, can fill out some 6 month clothing, has been rolling over both ways since before 3 months, "talks" nonstop, and is the happiest baby ever.  She prefers standing to lying down, has been sitting (assisted) since about 3.5 months, and can't stop chewing on everything - hands, feet, toys, blankets, clothes…you name it.

Here's her "official" monthly pics that I've forgotten to put up…

2 months…in a onesie that is, decidedly, too big for my girl :)


3 months…Ez joined in on the festivities :)



4 Months…with and without big brother



5 months!


Ezra has been growing, too!  Not so much in size, per se, but dammit…he's like a 12 year old now!  He's SO FUNNY.  He's got a ridiculous imagination, he's smart, he's got a memory like a steel vault.  He's got personality and attitude and…and more attitude ;-)  Really, we're kind of in the middle of a not-so-fun phase right now.  He's switched from being complete Mommy's boy to telling me that he doesn't love me…he loves Daddy instead.  He used to tell me that I was his best friend…now it's Daddy.  I miss my boy.  Like crazy.










More on all of that later.  Hopefully not too much later ;-)