Where we're at

Sooooo.....Ez and I are squatting at Dad's house for awhile.  Considering the whole reason for this blog was to keep family up-to-date on the goings-on of the kid, I'm guessing that if you're reading this, you probably know all of this already.  But I'm going to say it anyway...

When Dad went in for some testing to see why his leg and hip were getting so weak and got the news that lung lesions were spotted on chest films, I immediately went into denial.  "Oh, okay" I said.  He'd had prostate cancer before and lung cancer would be alright.  He'd be okay.

I booked flights for myself and Ezra for a couple weeks, about 2 weeks from then.  We'd spend some QT with Dad, I'd pack his freezer with ready-made, homemade meals, drive him to and from any necessary treatments, etc.  All would be okay.

Then it was preliminarily determined that his lower-limb weakness was due to metastasis.  Radiation started the next day.

BAM.

Then he had a serious decline over the final weekend - which was the end of his radiation and the weekend prior to Ez and I flying out.   He'd lost sensory from the waist - down.  He was severely dehydrated and in an enormous amount of pain.  He was so bad that he had been unable to even reach a phone to call for help.

He was admitted to the VA the day before I arrived.

BAM.

Stage 4 adenocarcinoma.

BAM.

The day after I arrived, he was moved to the hospice unit of the VA.

BAM.

Whatintheholyhellishappening?  How did this snowball SO fast?

He had a streak of really bad days.  Lots and lots of drugs to combat the pain.  That led to some pretty scary times.  For the last couple of weeks, he's been improving and finally got back to being "Dad" again.  He's lucid, he's talking, he's Dad.  Just, in a bed.

Am I absolutely heartbroken?  Yes.  Devastated?  Yep.  Overwhelmingly sad?  Uh-huh.  Angry and pissed and bitter that this is happening to MY Dad?  Hell yeah.

He's my Dad.  He's funny, he's kind, he's generous.  We disagree on most things, politically speaking, and if you ask him, he'll tell you that he has no idea how I came to be such a bleeding-heart liberal ;-)  I know exactly how & why...it's because he taught me to do the right thing and to stand up for what I believe in. (See how I did that?  I just blamed my FoxNews-watching-conservative-father for me being the polar opposite.)  He makes the best pizza.  He likes to shoot guns.  He has some pretty crazy stories from his time in Vietnam.  He's also got some pretty crazy stories from his travels within the US.  He'll buy an outsized jar of pickles at Sam's Club simply because it's a good deal....even if it'll take him a decade to go through it.  He insists on stocking his "beer fridge" next to the pool table with shitty Coors Light for his buddies, because damnit, that's what they drink.  He's easy-going.  He's read every book in all the local libraries.  He'll put hot sauce or garlic on anything.

He's awesome.

I'm so lucky that he's my Dad.  And I'm lucky that I'm getting to spend time with him and tell him just how lucky I am and just how amazing a father he is and just how much I love him.

Sea World (our 2nd home) & 22 week pics!

Ezra and I are heading out to Maine on Tuesday.  Cross your fingers there's none of our usual flight cancellations/delays/general dumbassery.  Seriously, I haven't travelled to the east coast in the past 4 years without having a flight cancelled...mid-trip.  Super-fun with a kiddo in-tow.  I'm hoping for some smooth sailing....errrr, flying, this time :) 

Knowing that there's UTZ potato chips waiting for me in every grocery store, gas station, etc on the east coast....makes it all worth it ;-)

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Surprise, surprise, we went to Sea World again!  We happened upon the end of Elmo's photo line, and Ezra thought it would be pretty fun to introduce his Dad to his buddy, Elmo.  Ez was so cute (again) with Elmo :)

Inside Turtle Reef, there's this video game where you get to be a turtle, swimming through the ocean, dodging sharks and fish and other things.  Ez's turtle usually just gets pushed through the game, as he's mostly just into holding the turtle (that's the controller - it's super cute) and watching the other turtles swim.  Either way, this game is a new must-do on his Sea World list...

And here he is, demonstrating how the shark swims through the ocean, attacking various things.  He really gets into it, with sound effects and everything ;-)

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 And here's some 22 week pics.  Big.  That's about all I have to say :)

Zoo pics & 21 weeks!

This kid has been keeping us outside everyday.  Not that I mind...it's just that he decides what he wants to do that day and it usually consists of at least one major park (Balboa, the zoo, Sea World) and also a playground.  Then, he has to water the flowers and play in his pool when we are finally allowed to go home.  Unlimited energy, this kid has.  I need to bottle it :)

This one makes me laugh...because clearly, Ezra was being a punk and refused to let me take his picture on top of the extinct American lion statue.  Jordan's plea to him fell on deaf ears ;-)

And here's Ez and his buddy, riding the SkyFari.  He's kind of obsessed with it.  Requires that we ride it at least once every time we visit the zoo.

He's been so freakin cute lately - when he plays "firefighter" with Jordan, and he gets a call that there's a fire in the kitchen, he always runs in, pushes me aside and says "Stay back, mommy!  There's a fire in here!  I'll save you!"  Unbelievably adorable, people.  

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So, 21 weeks.  I'm looking pretty ginormous (compared to last time), feeling just as huge, and also feeling a little nervous about the current state of my belly button.  It's really just a thin-skinned, flat spot on my stomach...that pokes out all creepy-like now.  It's gross, I'll admit it.  Really, ever since the baby-belly started showing, it's gotten progressively flatter and flatter.  Like, I'm worried that when this is over, it's not going to be normal ever again...that kind of thing.  Jordan refers to it as "that monstrosity on your stomach that used to be a belly button" and refuses to touch it.  Nice guy, huh?!

So far, nothing major (or minor, even) to report.  Still chugging along.  I did gain a LOT (like, 10 lbs) all at once right before the 2nd trimester began, but thankfully, it's been coming on a lot slower and more steady, since then.  I've got enough stretch marks on my hips from my early college-years weight gain...I really don't need to add more ;-)  

Playgrounds, Sea World & 20 week pics!

Once again, I'm falling behind on posting.  We've been running around a lot (what's new?!) and have just been really busy.  

Ez has been all about some playgrounds lately.  Mostly, I think he likes to make me nervous with all his climbing and swinging and utter craziness.  Seriously, he climbs up things that I really don't think were designed for a 2.5 year old.  Makes me feel like putting a leash on him ;-)

Here is the Mini-Man on some much safer playground equipment....Naturally, he finds the cars/trucks/things with wheels :)

He's also been really into Sea World lately.  Like, when we go to pick up Jordan from work, we usually make a stop there afterward.  Spoiled, spoiled kid.  Here he is checking out the penguins with Jordan.  He loves penguins and tries to imitate the sound they make...but it really just comes out more like an angry "Naaaach, Naaaach!"  People tend to look at us a little funny when he does it ;-)

He also insists on climbing this giant rope ladder/tunnel thing.  It's not so bad when Jordan is with us (I get to stay safely on the ground)....but he doesn't seem to care the Mama isn't really as small as she once was (and is growing bigger by the minute), so I end up traversing it with him, too.  The crawling through the tunnels is fine....losing my flip flops in the ropes...not so fun ;-)

And finally, he's also really into the splash pad they have in the Sesame Street Bay of Play area there.  Mostly, he likes to shoot the water directly in his own face.  Man, this kid...he's a crazy one...

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Here's the 20 week pics.  This kid is definitely taking advantage of his/her spacious accommodations.  I'm certainly bigger than I was at this point with Ezra.  WAY bigger.  

The Luckiest Kid Ever + 19 week pics

Do you need some proof that Ezra is the luckiest little boy in the world?  Here it is...

Our midwife made this happen for him at our last appointment.  He was so happy and kept talking about how he got to drive the "peace-cah" and it had "si-rees" and lights and he met a real "peace officah."  Yes, in case you're wondering, my kid talks with a slight Maine accent.  Or British.  Could be   either one, really.  

Jordan spent the morning with us at Sea World...

Ezra's favorite part of Sea World is whenever he gets to put his hands in the water...so he's a fan of the dolphins, manta rays, and tide pool creatures ;-)

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And here's the 19 week pics.  Looking and feeling pretty large these days.  I don't have a clever name for this little one - Ezra is the baby formerly known as Spork (like, you can't tell if a spork is a spoon or a fork...we didn't know if he was a boy or a girl...see?  Clever ;-))  Anyways, until I can come up with something, we'll just refer to this little him/her as The Baby.  So, The Baby has been moving around like a sugar-crazed, excited little maniac.  The Baby also likes to snuggle up as high/low as it can, causing a big ball of baby (and a funny-shaped gut for me).  Other than that, nothing really new to report.  This pregnancy, though very, very different from Ezra's, is still very easy now that the 1st trimester is long-gone.  

 And finally, here's a reminder that we do, in fact, still have some dogs ;-)  He's all clean (and white and sand-free!) from his post-beach bath.  He wasn't pleased (damn dog never appreciates a nice warm bath)...but I think he's 89% less itchy now :)

Earth Day!

It's kind of a thing now, going out to the Earth Day Earth Fair at Balboa each year.  It's always fun, always great people-watching, and you can always find something cool to spend some money on ;-)

A couple years ago, we stumbled upon the Skoy booth.  They're these awesome reusable non-paper towels.  Doesn't sound too exciting, but I'm telling you...they're really great.  The amount of paper towels we would use if not for these babies is criminal.  Anyways, we've only tossed out 2 since we bought a pack 3 years ago, but since I'd rather buy from a person standing in a booth than online, we had to find them again this year.  That was really our one and only goal of the day, which we achieved early-on...so there was plenty of time to wander around.  

Oh, and the other major plus was that there were more volunteers to hold up giant signs to hide all the crazy, fundamentalist, you're going to hell if you don't repent NOW, pro life, etc signs.  It made for a much more enjoyable experience - we didn't notice any arguments (there's always some) and everyone seemed much happier.  WIN.

Here's me and my E-Z, in our yearly pic. 

A shot down one of the main "streets," with lots of people.

We found a guy out for a nice stroll with his goats.  What?
Naturally, Ezra had to pet them.

Afterward, we went over to Sea World.  We figured that since so many people were over at the park, Sea World wouldn't be as bad as a normal Sunday.  It wasn't.  I mean, it was really crowded (it was seriously, the most beautiful day, so...) but it wasn't bad at all.
I didn't really think this one through -- I let him go play on the splash pad, thinking he'd get a little wet but not soaked to the bone.  I was wrong.  The kid went nuts.

We had to strip him down and let his clothes dry for a few minutes in the sun.  Even then, it took him another 2 hours to dry :)  It was worth it...did you see that face?  Sheer joy, folks.  

18 weeks & More Adventures with Ezra!

All of this is from last week.

I'm just getting worse at this as time goes on.  Not that it's bad, it's just that the very limited time that I do spend inside is usually spent cooking, doing laundry or cleaning up.  Being back in San Diego means spending every available moment outside, doing something way more awesome than sitting stagnant in a house ;-)  I love this city.

I'm just warning you now, these pictures are probably the least flattering EVER.  I'm in desperate need of a haircut, I was reallycrazystupid tired, and I'm wearing shorts that are too tight around my waist.  I'd already taken off my pants, and dammit, once they're off...they're off.  It's a rule, okay?

If you chose not to look, I don't blame you.  I'm only posting them because if I didn't, I'd be missing a week and then I'd be mad at myself in 4 years when I look back at how giant I was.  So, here's the 18 week pics...

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This would all be filed under the heading, "Proof that my kid is obsessed with his fireman hat."

At the playground, riding the fire truck...

At the zoo, playing on the mini-playground near the elephants...

Cooling off in his pool...

Winding up to splash his Dad and Brodie...

Even getting splashed in the face by Dad...

And once again, at the zoo.  He absolutely, positively MUST ride the SkyFari at least once each time we go to the zoo.  Sometimes, that's all he wants to do.  Screw the animals, man...the SkyFari is where it's at ;-)